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- 9 June 1915 (Production)
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[The British Hospital, Wimereux.]—After going for a swim this morning with other nurses she went to Boulogne to meet Gilbert. Describes her attendance on a dying man. Discusses her reasons for staying at Wimereux. Sir Henry Norman is expected to set off [for England] tomorrow. Her father’s boycott is ‘pathetic’.
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TRANSCRIPT:
June 9th 1915 Wednesday.
My darling no letter from you to-day, I couldnt have expected one, I got my one yesterday unduly quickly. Still in spite of that to-day hasnt been so bad, tho’ much the same as many others. I bathed in the morning with 4 of the other “sisters,” rather delicious & rough, but quite warm. Afterwards with great courage I bicycled into Boulogne on my new toy, the pseudo motor bicycle, &, incidentally, called on Gilbert. He hadnt much news, except that he told me he was sending all the Red X trains on to Havre so we shant have anything to do for a bit. Still to-day I’ve been quite fairly occupied as we’ve got a man dying of double broncho-pneumonia who has to have oxygen & brandy and cold sponging every half hour to try & keep him alive. He’s the first “case” I’ve ever had in which I’ve felt real keen professional interest and desire to keep going. I’m afraid he cant. I think I made out a very bad case for myself in favour of staying here. I know I cant pretend to you that I am in any way essential or irreplacable here. Up to now I cant hope to convince you if I were to say that I’d been enthralled by the work. No; for my best moments have been spent away from the hospital. Again I am fearfully happy with you, I know I shall become increasingly so, I often long for London & all its comforts and people. Those are all I admit overwhelmingly strong arguments against staying here and to which I cant pretend to find any answer: Except: that I just cant come home, my desire for a new sensation is too strong. Its just because I know how glorious it is being at home, and how more than wonderful now, that I must stay here in case something different were to happen that could never happen in London. By that I mean purely impersonal things, because humanly I am convinced I’ve got the very best that life can offer. No one thinks it unreasonable of Antony† to desert his wife & children and go first to France & then to the Dardanelles and yet he’s just as much as I am doing it for his own fun only. And quite right too. But my darling you’ve been so unspeakably sweet and generous to me about this gross piece of self indulgence of mine, that I dont know why I should inflict this long justification or explanation on you. I still cant get over how wonderful you are to me. I am astounded at my luck.
I had a very nice letter from Kath: to-day, she says Violet must be mad & advises me to pay no attention to her. I shant.
Sir Heinrich, I believe, returns tomorrow. I can live without him.
At this moment you are entertaining my family. Not Papa I suppose. His boycott, poor old boy, is really very pathetic.
Good night my darling.
Your ever loving
Venetia
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Written at the British Hospital, Wimereux.
† Sic.